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Better Marriage Blanket soaks up pesky ‘flatulence molecules’


May 7, 2010

As viewers of South Park will know, holding farts in can lead to spontaneous human combustion. Unfortunately letting one rip in the marriage bed can lead to the equally unwanted result of the withholding of snuggling. Thankfully there’s now a solution in the form of the Better Marriage Blanket that soaks up offensive “flatulence molecules” to keep any marriage smelling rosy through the most destructive Indian curry.

So how does the Better Marriage Blanket work its magic? Flatulence molecules pass through the blanket’s cotton shell and are absorbed into a layer of activated carbon fabric, which is apparently the same type of fabric used by the military to protect against chemical weapons. If the fart-busting blanket lives up to its claims we wonder how long it is before we start seeing underwear made using the same material.

Coming in beige or white the Better Marriage Blanket is available now in Twin, Queen and King sizes priced at US$29.95, $49.95 and $59.95 respectively.

Via Oh Gizmo!

About the Author
Darren Quick Darren's love of technology started in primary school with a Nintendo Game & Watch Donkey Kong (still functioning) and a Commodore VIC 20 computer (not still functioning). In high school he upgraded to a 286 PC, and he's been following Moore's law ever since. This love of technology continued through a number of university courses and crappy jobs until 2008, when his interests found a home at Gizmag. All articles by Darren Quick

Now if only they can figure out how to easily and cheaply harvest the absorbed molecules from the activated carbon, the dream of methane-capturing underwear for people and livestock will finally be a reality for green energy.

I\'m looking forward to a carbon-neutral steak already. :)

Suman Subramanian

I feel uncomfortable sleeping under a blanket that houses the molecules of a thousand nocturnal emissions. Do they wash out or remain trapped there eternally like a soul in hell.

Ro Atkinson

I love on the video where is claims that this will make an excellent wedding or anniversary gift...um...what kind of a message would that be if you got THIS as an anniversary gift?


Hmmm.....I\'m visualizing....diapers for COWS! Wah-Lah! Capturing those COW FARTS and 7% of the cause of Global Warming.....CURED!

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