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HEALTH AND WELLBEING

The CB6000 chastity belt for naughty men (NSFW)

By

03:56 January 10, 2011

Who's been a bad boy?

Who's been a bad boy?

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Our publisher Mike ran into this device at the Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas. It took him a good five minutes to work out what it was for. "This is fascinating," he thought to himself, "and it really needs to be written up for Gizmag. But certainly not by me." So I'm not sure whether to take it as a compliment or a measure of my character that he immediately sent the story my way ... anyway, in the interests of transparency, I wish to point out before we get started that the only chastity devices I have ever used have been my looks and my personality – and even those powerful tools haven't been very effective.

What Mike was looking at was the CB-6000 chastity belt for men. Built from medical grade polycarbonate plastic, it's a complicated looking cage that fits around and over a gentleman's tackle, rendering the entire lunchbox more or less ornamental, except for bathroom trips.

Both the shape and the way it locks on are designed to keep things on the down-low, shall we say – or as Mike put it, "If you cracked a trouser chumpy while wearing one of these, you'd do yourself a serious injury."

Certainly, when you hear the term "chastity belt" the female version tends to spring to mind first, medieval devices that were reportedly built by crusading knights to make sure their wenches remained unplundered in their absence. But you'd have to agree a male version makes just as much sense – we lads certainly haven't done a lot over the years to earn the ladies' trust, on average.

But the strange irony of the CB-6000 – and devices like it – is that they're designed to prevent sexual pleasure, but they're used … more or less ... for sexual pleasure.

Submissive fellas seem to find great excitement in the idea of power exchange – locking their tockleys in boxes, giving the keys to their dominant partners and walking around all day dangling a weighty reminder of who's their daddy.

But the devices are marketed mainly at the ladies – to quote the website (which is kept remarkably safe for work), "This is an extremely powerful and effective relationship device. Become his fantasy once again. He will think you are the sexiest thing in this world. Wearing the chastity device can be extremely erotic … after he has been in it for a short period of time, he will again start kissing, caressing, and basically be completely turned on by you. He will worship the ground you walk on. Men love power and knowing you have exchanged this power will bring him to his knees."

There's something a little sad about the idea that some men will only show tenderness to their partners if they're denied an easier source of sexual release – but then, there's something a little sad about a lot of the ways we humans operate.

Of course, this sort of thing doesn't have to be used for kinky thrills or relationship fixes. I can vividly remember a couple of embarrassing predicaments in the earlier years of high school, in which I'd have given my right arm for a technological solution like this – at least, if that right arm wasn't holding an exercise book over my crotch. Ah, the memories.

The CB-6000 costs US$159.95. You can get it in clear plastic, or if you don't like that "bulldog with its face up against a window" look, there's a few color options. For the outdoorsy gent, there's a camouflage version; you'll never know where it went. If you like the idea of sporting a terminator willy, go for the polished chrome. Or my personal favorite – remind yourself of what you're missing out on with the wood finish.

See the Chastity Belt for Men website for more details.

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User Comments (19)
 

this is the first time Ive ever commented on here.

and its only to say awesome writing great comedy at the end there for the custom ones. I can see why your publisher picked you for this one.

comment David Escorcia - January 10, 2011 @ 10:03 am PST

It seems like this would make you look like you have a boner...ALL the time.

comment Dabu - January 10, 2011 @ 01:14 pm PST

Haha, that's hilarious! Hats off to Loz!

comment Facebook User - January 10, 2011 @ 05:30 pm PST

I wonder if I can get one to fit my randy dog?

comment Wally3178 - January 10, 2011 @ 05:55 pm PST

I concur... awesome post without stooping to easy gutter comments. Great job! And now I'll never complain about any job assignment I get again....

comment alcalde - January 10, 2011 @ 10:09 pm PST

Looks as if it could double as a dildo!

comment paulblez - January 11, 2011 @ 05:03 am PST

Good command of language always turns me on. I bet some of my grade school nuns would have loved this device...

comment dsiple - January 11, 2011 @ 08:53 am PST

What a hilarious article and I don't just mean the product. The write up is hilarious, I'm glad you got the job Loz.

comment warren52nz - January 11, 2011 @ 05:01 pm PST

Very funny but also real. Amazon is discounting them to $127.42...

comment Page Schorer - January 11, 2011 @ 07:23 pm PST

Camo, just in case.

comment Facebook User - January 11, 2011 @ 07:32 pm PST

those look kinda short and/or painful to wear = yuk!

comment Blue Lucero - January 11, 2011 @ 08:46 pm PST

Awesome write-up. Many thanks!

comment Mark Chaudhary - January 17, 2011 @ 03:26 pm PST

At last ... this site's made the leap to becoming Jizmag.com. Kewl!

That being said, Mr. Engineer here says d*ck DOWN on these gizmos. Unless they're paired with potassium chloride treatment (anti-randiness treatment, usually administered with milkshakes), these things need a bellows mechanism (NOT bolts!) to account for natural stretching.

On the positive side, just a minor modification could make these VERY attractive to women; just remove the lock and bolts.

Using different materials will make it attractive to both men AND women: using ivory, rhino horn, and tiger skeletons will give new meaning to 'bone'.

Cheers!

Dread Zontar

comment Dread Zontar - January 23, 2011 @ 11:52 am PST

http://www.wholesale-bdsm.com/cb6000-male-chastity-device-p-654.html

cheapest cb6000 for all fans.

comment chastitybeltfans - April 5, 2011 @ 07:58 am PDT

nice.

comment Facebook User - April 5, 2011 @ 08:01 am PDT

RE:"...medieval devices that were reportedly built by crusading knights to make sure their wenches remained unplundered in their absence."

That's what I'd always heard, turns out the information is absolute crap. They were an anti-rape device for a traveling woman & any wearer could get there hands on a key any time they wanted.

If a woman was locked into such a thing for a long time she'd probably get a bunch of nasty infections, poor sleep, and major rage. And if a woman survived wearing such a thing for months or a couple of years, what do you think she would do to someone that put her in it?

comment Dave B13 - July 6, 2011 @ 01:40 pm PDT

Loz

That was one of the funniest articles I've read for a long time.

Can't stop laughing at the bulldog line!!

Good man.

comment keithbrook - December 28, 2011 @ 03:20 am PST

weren't these first designed back in medieval days as anti-onanism devices for male adolescents?

comment Bryan Paschke - January 6, 2012 @ 01:47 pm PST

The perfect Valentine's Day gift? LOL

comment Rex Decker - February 8, 2012 @ 08:29 am PST
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